Husband texts to wife on cell..........
"Hi, what r u doing Darling?"
Wife : I'm dying........!
Husband jumps with joy buy types: "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"
Wife : "U idiot! I'm dying my hair ...."
Husband: "Bloody English Language!"
An Angry Wife To Her Husband On Phone :
"Where d Hell Are You ...?"
Husband: Darling you remember that Jewellery Shop where you saw the Diamond Necklace n totally fell in love with it n I didn't have the money that time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ....."O:)
Wife, with a smile & blushing: Yeah I remember that my Love!
Husband: I'm in the PUB just next to that shop.......
An airline introduced a Special Package for Business Men. Buy Ur Ticket Get Your Wife's Ticket Free.
After great success, the company sent letters to all the wives asking How Was The Trip......
All of them gave a same reply ..... "Which Trip"
Husband was seriously ill. Doc to wife : Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant & in good mood, don't discuss your problems, no TV serial, don't demand new clothes & gold jeweleries,
Do it for 1 yr & he will be ok...
On the way home... husband: What did the Doc say?
Wife: No chance for u to survive ....
Woman buys a new SIM card, puts it in her phone and decides to surprise her husband who is seated on the couch in he living room.
She goes to the kitchen, calls her husband with the new number: "Hello Darling"
The husband responds in a low tone : "Let me call U back later honey, the Dumb Lady is in the Kitchen....."
A wife treats hubby by taking him to a Lap Dance Club for his birthday .......
At the Club : Doorman says : Hi Jim How R you ?
Wife asks: How does he know you?
Jim says: Oh dear, I play football with him..
Inside Barman says: The Usual Jim ?
Jim says to wife: before you say anything, he's on the Darts Team in my Local....
Next a Lap Dancer says: Hi Jim, Do you Crave Special Again ?...
The wife storms out dragging Jim with her & jumps into a Taxi ......
Driver says : "Hey Jimmy Boy, You Pick Up An Ugly One This Time ......."
Jim's funeral is on Sunday.
Cool msg by a woman: Dear Mother-in-law, "Don't teach me how 2 handle my children, I'm living with one of yours & he needs a lot of improvement"
A sweet demand by a kid.
A kid was beaten by his mom. Dad came n asked :- what happen son ?
Kid said: I can't adjust with your wife anymore, I want my own ......
Having "WIFE" is a Part of Living ...........
But having : "GIRLFRIEND" along with the "WIFE" is the Art Of Living....
It is said that Husband is the Head of the family, but remember tht 'wife' is the Neck of the family
& the Neck can turn the Head exactly the way she wants.
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife"
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman."
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
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