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Jokes

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Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?

A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it

doesn't come means you are in big trouble.



Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?

A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear
at
night.



Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?

A: Because they are tired of using their own.

Q: What's common between men and video?

A: Both go backward... forward... backward... forward... backward....

forward... stop and eject.



Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?

A: A teabag.



7 qualities to be a perfect wife:

Beautiful,

Responsible

Energetic

Adora! ble

Sweet

Truthful and

Self-Organized.

In short, she must have good B.R.E.A.S.T.S



Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?

A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.



Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?

A: When the baby looks like his dad, then it is bi! ology. When the
baby
looks like the neighbour, then it is sociology.



Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals a day as I

have advised?

Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day.



Q: Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a mosquito
enters
the girl's skirt. Guess where it would have bitten?

Answer: The boy's hand.



Q:   Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath. Tarzan

removed his clothes. All the animals laughed. Tarzan asked 'Why'?

A:   The animals told him...........'Your tail is in the front'.





    Chinese Poem - Original Version

    Chuang Qian Ming Yue Guang

    Yi Shi Di Shang Shuang

    Ju Tou Wang Ming Yue

    Di Tou Si Gu Xiang





    (2) ( English Version)

        The moon light is pouring down on my bedside

    Like white frost spreading on the ground

    I look up the bright round moon in the sky

    And lower my head thinking of my dear hometown





    (3) ( Singlish - Phua Chu Kang Version)

    Bedfront Moon Bright Bright

    Think Is Floor White White

    Lift Head See Moon Moon

    Bow Head Miss Home Home...



    (4) (Ah-Beng Version)

    Bedfront Orr Pi Sai (pick nose)

    Think Think Go Pa! ng Sai

    Pick Up Tai Gor Tai (handphone)

    Bull Shit While Lau Sai



    (5) ( Latest Reservist Army Version)

    Bedfront Lau Bark Sai (tears drop)

    Thinking About Exercise (reservist mobilization)

    Drop Dead Look Into The Sky (run until no

    Breathe)

    Tong Kor Sia Lang Zai? (my sadness nobody knows)



    (6) ( Osama version)

    No friend at my side

    Think think Bush will fight

    Lift head but where to hide?

    This time don't know when will die ?



    (7) ( Bush version)

    Can't sleep since that night

    Think think where he hide ?

    Bomb bomb friends will say I pai

    No choice ask them go fly kite